B'day dedication to the one and only RENEE CHEWIES!

This is by far, one of the worst things I've ever done and the most honest confession I have ever made (as far as I can remember). Today marks the 22nd year that my best friend (aka myself) has been on this earth. And guess what? I've been so caught up with life, not paying attention to the dates and everything that I actually forgot it was the 17th of October. It's now 11.36pm in Melbourne and...I still can't believe I forgot. WOWWWWWWW what a failure. Anyway, this public birthday post isn't an apology to say sorry that your birthday slipped my mind like wow I'm so mad at myself you have no idea LOL but anywayyy, LIFE GOES ON...

I've known you for close to 2 years now and I've to say, I've never met anyone like you. You've the purest soul. Such a good heart, kind soul, weird being, funny to the max, hard working, creative, musically gifted and well, you're just beautiful both inside and out. I'd make a whole list of your amazing qualities, and also a separate list of your strange jokes, and a separate list for every person's name that you've forgotten, and another list for the amount of times you've had to explain to someone about the story behind your fear/hatred for eggs, but..the list could kinda go on forever. LOL. I've a lot to say, but at the same time I don't really know what to say because there's too much to say. I guess..hmm. I'm just really thankful for you, I thank God for putting you in my life because I know for sure that my life would be very different if I hadn't met you. Especially my life in Monash. Also, I miss(ed) you every day when I was/am in Melbourne. It's kinda saddening sometimes, not being able to eat and hang with you and all that good old fun stuff lol or just being with you and doing nothing and not saying anything, but oh wait we don't really have silent conversations do we, HAHA. 

Anyway, I can't wait to go back to Malaysia and see your beautiful face in person and hang with you cause I miss you so much T_T Happy birthday once again, to be honest, I feel like the most terrible horrible vegetable friend ever for totally forgetting this special day of yours, but I guess being honest with you is the least I could do right now. Lol! But really, thank you for your friendship and you're the David to my Jonathan. LOL okay that sounded reallyyy weird but...you've been the greatest friend. I pray that our friendship will continue to blossom like flower and may God reveal Himself to you more and more even as you seek Him, and you'll be the woman that God has called you to be. Thank you for being an inspiration to me and to many others, I'm sure. :) And omgosh this is the most formal I've ever written to you HAHAH.

Hope you had a great one, take care and ILY (I really do, but I feel extremely weird saying or typing that out so...much love!) Stay amazing coz u iz more than amazing <3

The most dreaded question: "How are you?"

"How are you?"

"How's life?"

"How've you been?"

"But really, how've you been lately?"

I hate it when people ask me those questions. I mean, I don't hate them for asking those questions, it's more like I hate answering those questions. Why? Because I don't know myself. If life's going well, then yeah, life's good. I'll end the conversation at that. But no, I usually don't know how my life is going, my standard answer would always be "Good! ..I guess" or "Fine. I guess" or "Umm..pretty good?" Or something along those lines. On the other hand, when things aren't going to well, I'd say "Alright...not great but yeah I'm not gonna tell you about my problems and how depressed I am right now cause I'm not that close to you and I suck at expressing myself anyway so yeah".

And how do people usually respond to my answers? "Okaay...you don't seem too happy". But what am I supposed to say? I don't even know, lol. Sometimes I don't want to sound like an idiot, so I just make something up. Like "Oh good, went on a road trip last weekend. Had a blast, mate" and yeah the subject usually shifts towards another direction after that.

But really, how do you guys even answer those questions? Do you really mean what you say? Cause I definitely don't. Most times anyway...

Pet peeves.

In no particular order:

1) Accidentally opening an unread Whatsapp conversation (whether by someone else or myself).
Like, I just can't. I'm the type of person that would wait for an opportune time to reply people properly, and so when I accidentally open one of my unread whatsapp conversations it's like..man. Y u do dis 2 me.

2) People shaking their legs profusely without realising it.
Especially when we're in an exam hall and an exam is taking place. I would just be sitting there, trying to do my thing and at the corner of my eye I can see this person's leg, just...ughh. Hahah, sorry but it's sooo distracting.

3) Cocky and arrogant people.
Need I say more?

4) Freeloaders.
Freeloading once in a while is fine, if you genuinely show some kind of appreciation to the other person. BUT, taking advantage of people is a different story.

5) Talking with your mouth full.
This isn't a big pet peeve, but talking with your mouth feel just doesn't particularly look aesthetically pleasing to the eye so..

6) Noisy people in the cinemas.
You could save your questions for later, thank you... ^-^"

7) Over-hyped anything.
Places, events, songs, movies, brands, books, hot blokes, anything, really. 

8) Keeping the TV on when no one is actually watching it.
Happens all the time. To everyone, I'm sure.

9) Overly public displays of affection.
Ah, the good old PDA topic. How much is too much? I don't know. It's subjective to each individual. But posting one million lovey dovey selfies and captions on social media for the world to see is not needed, in my opinion.

10) Copycats.
It's totally cool if you get inspiration from here and there and incorporate those into your daily lives, but wanting and trying to be like someone else..that's where you're losing your sense of self identity. Just be yourself! Trust me, no one's gonna hate you for that. Instead, people are most likely going to appreciate you for well, being you.

20 facts about me.

1. I'm quite a bit of a big eater.
2. I never gain weight, and it saddens me.
3. Music is my passion.
4. I never watched Star Wars.
5. Or Lord of The Rings.
6. Awkward in general.
7. Enjoy watching people play video games.
8. Obsessed with babies and dogs.
9. My worst subject in secondary school was Moral Studies. I'm clearly immoral based on my Moral Studies grade, guys..haha. Thank you Malaysia. Sarcasm intended, just in case you didn't get that. 
10. I could go a whole year without eating chocolate.
11. I've lived in 3 countries within a span of one year.
12. I went to 1 kindergarten, 2 primary schools, 3 high schools and 2 universities.
13. I admire people who stay true to themselves and aspire to be like that.
14. I value gifts a lot more when there is some thought and effort put into it.
15. I've easily had more than 15 hamsters before.
16. I'm not as happy-go-lucky as I seem to be at times.
17. I don't express myself well in person, at all.
18. More of a realist than an optimist.
19. I can watch any genres of film BUT horror..ugh.
20. I hate crying in front of people, and so I don't.

My first time.

What was your first car? 
Myvi, but it wasn't really mine. It was kind of a family car..? I've no idea.

Who was the first person who you cared more about their well being than your own? 
I honestly don't know.

When was your first public speaking success? 
Probably only later in life..? 'Success' is subjective, but I'd consider public speaking success to be when I still feel nervous but manage to keep my cool and kind of speak in front of a crowd without stuttering, embarrassing myself (much anyway) or just having a complete mind blank. So..probably when I was about 17?

When was the first time you got stitches? 
Never got em.

When was the first time you stayed up all night and watched the sunrise? 
Never stayed up to watch the sunrise.

What was the first thing you learned to cook?
 Instant noodles! Maggi mee in particular.

What was your first paying job? 
Cafe/food stall all rounder.

When was the first time you flew on an airplane?
 As far as I can remember, when I was 8. To Paris :D Worst 13 hour flight ever. I was just puking throughout.

What was the first concert you went to see?
Planetshakers. But I don't really like calling that a concert, so...David Choi live in Bangkok, 2013!

What was your first bike like?
 Um I'm pretty sure it was a tricycle, don't remember the colour, unfortunately..

When was the first time you shot a gun? 
Just a month ago, but that was a BB gun.

When was the first time you moved houses?
When I was 3 or something like that, based on old photographs. Lol

When was the first time you threw a punch? 
I was young and foolish, but yeah I threw a punch at a punching bag. I've never punched a real life person before, as far as I can recall...

When was the first time you quit a job?
 Last year, lol.

What was the first professional sporting event you went to? 
No

When was the first time you realized you are good at your job?
Um. I'm not great at being a student so

When was your first regrettable hair style? 
Hahahaha I have no idea. I don't regret that often when it comes to cutting my hair cause I'm a pretty boring person when it comes to hairstyles. But probably when I was 13, when I wanted to have emo fringe but the hairdresser kinda screwed it up a lil. Haha!

What was your first business venture?
 In the toilet LOL JOKES I'm so disgusting sorry.

How old were you when you first left home?
17, if in the context of leaving my home country to live in another country. 20, in the context of living away from home and my family to study abroad in another country. Leaving home to settle down with a man, um that's not happening anytime soon so yeahh hahah.

When you the first time you cut class? 
Whoa er..primary school, probably. I learned the ways of the world at quite a young age. Lol!

How old where you when you had your first kiss? 
5 or 6. (Sorry parents) But it's okay. *no shame* After that, I never even held hands with a guy until this year. HAHA. Like yeah, achievement unlocked after 15 years, good job Kimberly.

When was the first time you went fishing? 
Probably when I was about 7! I didn't particularly enjoy it cause my dad used worms as baits and I HATE WORMS. I can't even look at realistic drawings of worms. Lame.

How old where you when you got your first computer?
First laptop, when I was 17.

When was the first time you stood up for your self?
Hmmmmmm I don't remember. Sorry. I am making this tag sound so boring. HAHA I'm sorry, my memory just fails me sometimes.


So there you go, just a little insight into my not-so-fun life. :D

God-shaped hole.

As we draw so near to You

Would You draw so near to us?

Lord as we cry

Would you meet us where we are?

There's a God-shaped hole in my heart

That only You can fill

I need You to feel the void

When God speaks.

Earlier this year, I attended my first ever OCF Easter camp in Melbourne and I've to say, it exceeded my expectations. F and B asked if I could play the bass for them if I was going for Easter camp and I thought, well..I guess I could help out. So yeahhh, I honestly did not step foot onto the camp site expecting much, but man, God was just so gracious to me. He gave me opportunities to serve even without me asking, readied an awesome group of people with whom I spent most of those 5 days with, provided such good camp food (or rather, good OCF chefs!) although again, I wasn't expecting much because c'mon, which camp actually serves good food, right? ...wrong. From lasagna, to chicken rice, to roasted chicken, to cheese toasties...I couldn't have asked for better camp food LULZ. But most importantly..God spoke to me and revealed Himself to me even though I was not earnestly seeking Him at that time, and I did not ask Him for anything. But He came, when I was least expecting it. He showed up, tugged my spirit gently, and He let me know that He, indeed, was real.

These events happened 5 months ago, but I just wanted to share my story with everyone. And this is also a gentle reminder to myself, of God's goodness and graciousness to me. P/S I will be copying and pasting my testimony from Facebook! So here goes...

During ministry night, I went up for prayer, and I didn't feel that God put anything into my heart in particular to be prayed for, but I just went anyway. I just knew that I felt very spiritually dry.

Then EH started praying for me and she kept saying that I should trust in God and be more confident in whatever I do. After that JT also prayed for me, I said I didn't know what to pray for so I asked him to pray for anything. He also prayed the same thing as EH which I thought was okay la, a bit cool.

On the very last day, I received a long note from my mortal and at the end he said "you are so loved by our Heavenly Father! A father who protects His beautiful daughter like a roaring lion, never doubt yourself for if the Lord is with you, who can be against you?" It never occurred to me that it all interlinked. Until right before I stepped out of the barn house (where we had all our sessions), I picked up a piece of 'rubbish' to throw away, but it actually turned out to be a verse from Jeremiah 17:7-8 which said "But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him. They will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when the heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a fear of drought and never fails to bear fruit" (Sorry in advance, to whoever that sticky note belonged to, I kinda just took it home with me haha).

And I knew it wasn't all just a coincidence. I always felt inadequate to do things, even tasks for God. And I think that is a bit self centered of me. To decide not to take up on certain tasks just cause I don't think I can do it (by relying on my own strength). And I think my feeling of inadequacy is stopping me from carrying out God's purpose in my life, so I just wanna encourage everyone that, I believe, God can and will use us no matter how little we think we have to offer, but if God is with us, nothing else can stand against us.

I hope my story has managed to encourage at least some of you out there, especially those who feel incompetent in one way or another. I'm not saying I overcame the feeling of incompetence, but I definitely learned to put my confidence in Christ and not in myself. Because God is made strong in our weaknesses. :)

The piece of 'rubbish' that i found. :P [EDIT: After 5 months, I found out (literally just 5 minutes ago) that Steffi was the one who wrote this verse...HAHAHAHHAHAAH too funny, but 'twas really a blessing in disguise! God is so funny. Heh.]

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 

-2 Corinthians 12:9 -